Sunday, October 14, 2007
To see you actually voicing out though helping me in a way by keeping my identity(which I'm fortunate to see you still understand). I think you're right, I did went off the toll! Cross the limit.
But anyway that
aint what I'm here to say.
All
thats happening is just affecting my performance in everything, but I'm still coping with it as its all meant to be because I asked for it! I "
pleaded" to be this situation.
In karate class, I cant get my head in the right place,
couldnt relax my mind and ended up being so stiff in all my movements that I got scolded. I cant even get the new Kata in my head.
Didnt even get to help out training the children( I just love children, so carefree). Everything just wasnt right in class.
Not only that, when I study with the music on, I still feel the guilt in my heart, but I'll hang on to that. Time will pass by and things will be all right.
Even my lack of
concentration in music class forced me to replay the same piece again
and again. Even when the skin falls off my fingers the size of
quarters and the redness and pain while choking the strings hurts, I had to replay and pay the price for not
concentrating.
I had to tall a day's off from work, just
didnt feel right to enter without my jolly mood. Even on a promo shoot, I was sent home, because they cant work with me who is currently "NOT ME"
thats what they said.
Seriously, I cant get my head straight...
Dang, just hoping that you're alright!
But I've still gotta give you your space... so I'm trying hard!
And I'm proud that we
didnt talk for 24 hours already, at least I'm trying and it is working!
BYE BOOMS!
~maybe next week will be better~
silenced at 10/14/2007 06:32:00 PM
